I may not like everything about where I’m at.
My plans to go to the orphanage in Mexico got canceled. I took on more classes at the Community College, but instead of enjoying them they just stress me out. I miss my car, and don’t have the money to fix it. And because I’m trying to save, I’ve had to learn to deny myself a lot of things in the past year, which is of course hard (though I’m sure it’s good for me).
My life right now may not particularly meet my human ideals.
But this is where God has me.
Friends that I love desperately have gone off track, and it fills me with pain.
I said goodbye about six months ago to the town where I’d spent almost eight years of my life, and though I was happy then, I have suddenly been flattened by a desperate wave of sadness and vivid memories of my life there and the people I knew and loved.
Often I wonder if my life is a mistake. If I’m making all the wrong decisions.
I see my cousin who is graduating and heading off to nursing school. She has her life figured out. She has a plan. Everyone is proud of her. I realize what people must think of me: poor, without a definite plan for my life.
But then I look up.
And I have peace. Because I’m seeking my God day by day, and it is to Him I answer, not to others. He knows my heart. He has a plan. Maybe it’s nothing to other people. Maybe to them, my life is a failure. But I smile, ear to ear, because in God’s eyes, it’s beautiful.
And you know what? I don’t have to like where I’m at, because I LOVE who I’m with. I get to spend the rest of my life with the One I adore above all others.
“I am continually with thee…” Ps. 73:23
And no matter what my life is like, His love is with me forever.
“Who shall separate us from the love of Christ?” Romans 8:35
“…for love is strong as death; jealousy is cruel as the grave: the coals thereof are coals of fire, which hath a most vehement flame. Many waters cannot quench love, neither can the floods drown it: if a man would give all the substance of his house for love, it would utterly be contemned.” Song of Solomon 8:6-7
God alone strikes upon the deepest passions within me. He penetrates the deepest level of my soul.
So why shouldn’t I be content that I am right where He has me?
Dear friend, if you try to win others’ approval with your life, to measure up to their ideas of success, may I encourage you to set your sights higher. Instead, seek God’s approval. Aspire to meet His standards. Make Him your satisfaction and confidence.
“Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal: But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal:” Matthew 6:19-20
“Better is the end of a thing than the beginning thereof: and the patient in spirit is better than the proud in spirit.” Ecclesiastes 7:8